All I Want Is A Warm Heart

Life is uninspired
Each Breath feels lik a chore
As my heart clunks like a heavy heaving machine
The Coggs slowly grind with slow creeks
As the eyes lure with insipped images
Of peoples faces gurning at me

I bwould scream at the man sat opposit me
Looking sullen at me
He asks whats going on in my head?
My thoughts are buzzing around my head
As I gear up my voice
To try and project it out
Stumbling over my words

I try to rattle out my thoughts
Not wanting to lie to the man
For costing me arms and a legs
To listen to me
My falling voices lear with a nervouse energy
The man swipes away with his ears
And points of view are spinning me
Trying to trip me into something
Of a possitive menta state

But I know that when I am outside
My slate will be wiped into the cold dark dusk
Even if the sub is shining
I still can't see it
Because there are so many clouds in the way
I spoke with a heart choking frustration
As I talk of smiles intimidating me
Like shody clowns from the IT factory

The man cringes looking at my face
An airy scaredness trickles down from his eyes
I don't know why I am mentally in this place
Like a weary bird in a cage
Staring at the blank spaces in this world
A cold hearted mess in this life

All I want is a waRM heart in this world to try and hug me

I find myself looking at groups from the outsiders face
The happy chatting voices press press alienation
Haunting words in my head
I explained to the man
How I was better off Dead
Son I can see your voice is drowning down low in the muddy waters
But please don't go you have everything to grow
Just remember th smiles
But I aint seenh them for a while
God I used to remember Iused to love a smile
but now I can barely twinge my face
Without a worthless distate around me

By Jeffrey Johns 10/7/2009

Broken Toys

Broken toys rattle in the pram
As Mummies coughing up skag
And Daddies pulling scams
To bring the medicine man
Down too town
Just give me one pure hit of sugar
She would croak in his ear
Full of anxiety and fear
That a dependency cohurses
as the baby would scream
And her thin thin pasty skin would cream
Rattling the pram with
Her waisting wrists knotted

Broken Toys rattle in the Pram

As the puncture holes
Lay bare in her arms
And Daddies teeth wore black
Filing into holes
Of emotional blackmail
Please pull us in the pennies
So we can feed this lovely child
He would shout
With a whisky stale smell
Too everything including his
Coat amd tail
As he would spend it
On the cheap white Lightening

Broken Toys rattle in the pram

Mummy would pull all of her favoures
As she is lost on a downward spiral
Of daddies lashing out fists
For once they were a happy couple
And he cared for her heart
Just to be taken out by a menacing diseas
Leaving her with scars
On her brazen arms
Marked lumps stick out like sore thumbs
Where he had battered her
With a bass ball bat

Broken Toys rattle in the pram

The Baby is lying dirty
Untreated due to the circumstances around it
The tears of desolation
Run down the marked face
As it cries out for more touches
Of the heart to give it some warmth
As Mothers breast milk has run dry
From her lust of the Honeycombe
And the brown sugar
She wants to fix up in her life

By Jeffrey Johns 14/6/09